Whirlwind!

The next several days following your birth felt like we had been sucked up in a giant whirlwind. Little did we know that for at least 5 days we would be booked solid with appointments and huge life decisions.

Saturday January 15th-

We were discharged from the hospital mid morning and headed "home." It was decided that we would gather several changes of cloths and spend the next few days tucked out in the country with family out at mom and dad's.

We knew we would have to chose a funeral home and also a cemetery but we never dreamed of all the decisions that came with each. On our way back to our home we drove through two cemeteries out hwy 5. Both would be on our way home and have easy access to our Litte One if at any time we wanted to "check-in" on him. Our only decision we needed to make was which one would we chose? Sounds simple enough right? WRONG! We made several circles around each cemetery. One set of grandparents where buried or would be buried in each set. Would we offend our grandparents if we didn't chose the same area that they had?

The Lord once again was carrying us through that day! As we made one last circle through Pine Crest he lead us to drive by a small semi frozen pound. Nestled behind the pond was a fairly new memorial garden call rightfully named "The Garden of Memories." It was still partially snow covered in areas and dressed beautifully with oak trees. Upon further inspection the ground was blanketed with acorns. If you know our family then you know we LOVE watching the deer feed in back fields at my parents house. I know it sounds strange but we were at complete peace standing under an oak tree in the middle of a cemetery.

Another Angel met us at the office of the cemetery. She took us in and made us feel right at home. I know at first she probably thought we were all nuts but said she understood. She too had property in the middle of the country and understood all to well about watching and feeding the deer. She was nearly certain that there were plenty of plots left in that garden but the map was slightly off. She asked us to meet her the next day after speaking with the funeral home and she would have our spots mapped out so that our family (my father chose to purchase land for us all at this time so that we'd all be together) would have the exact spots we wished. We would also have to place a small white flag for Jackson letting the workers know where his little body would be laid to rest. We didn't realize that it was so late when we arrived at the office of the funeral home but our Angel stayed 2 hours well past when the office should have closed! We thank the lord daily for all of her service!

We were showered with the most wonderful meal when we returned home! It was all amazing but I'll never forget how good those strawberries and bananas tasted and the chocolate drizzled bunt cake had been just what I'd craved the last few weeks but had been too sick eat!

Sunday January 16th-

Sunday we spent as a family. Still running around taking care of what seemed like hundreds of errands but as a family nonetheless. Dean and I slept till nearly noon which was wonderful for our bodies but nearly sent us into a panic knowing that we had that much less time to take care of all our arrangements for our little one!

The funeral home had to delay our meeting that morning for about an hour and a half but that allowed us to take dad out to the cemetery.We showed him the piece of property and he said that it were absolutely perfect! There was even a deer track in nearly the exact spot that we would lay our son to rest!

One of if not the hardest appointments of the week started Sunday morning at Ashby's. As a couple of late 20somethings we never dreamed we would have to sit down and plan the arrangements for our precious son! God was with us yet again as anger Angel sat with us took his time and walked us through the entire process. It was safe to say that we were beyond overwhelmed! Should we do a visitation? should we just do a graveside service? Would anyone think it was important enough to come if we had a visitation?

Ultimately we decided that we would have a small visitation and a service in the chapel of Ashby's. We would also have a short graveside service. We knew that most likely it would just be us at the graveside but felt it was vital in our healing. We didn't have to make all the decisions about music that day but we would have to have our selections soon. My dear husband brought us all to tears as he picked the perfect song Brahms Lullaby for our son's memorial. The only decision left was to view the casket that they had for Little Angels just like our Jackson.

It was absoulty perfect. Small but cozy. Snow white just as the color of perfection! They had even included a small teddy bear! Again we were all balling but they couldn't have made a more perfect place for our son's body to rest!

Our last stop for the day was to speak again with the office staff. We had gone earlier that morning to verify the markings because they had been "off" on the map we looked previously. We knew the spots marked were closer than what we had wanted but within minutes she was able to make notes and assured us that in the am they would be resurvey and we could verify the placement in the am. 

Famished and with evening upon us we all headed to Colton's for dinner. By this time this evening we had just about reached our limit on crying. My aunt joined us for the meal. I'm sure as sleep deprived as we all were just about anything made us laugh. We had a wonderful meal with our family. The Lord blessed us and allowed us to have a relaxed evening meal before our next hard day!

Monday January 17th-

Flowers and Conformation of his little plot were on the agenda for this morning. Our Angel from the cemetary called us in the AM with a 'major problem' that she'd discovered when the main crew came in that morning. Knowing how partial to the deer track we found the days before she was terrified to call us and let us know that two of the spots we thought we'd have had already been bought. Little did she know that those two spots moved our plots to the right just enough that deer track was right over Jackson's plot! She then had to have the workers re survey the spots and we would have to come back that afternoon and confirm placement for Jackson's Dig.

We met yet another angel at the flower shop. With the visitation that evening we were unsure what they could get done with such short notice. Little did we realize that they work quite well and often with little notice! She sat down with us and guided us through the whole process. I've never seen or had more flowers or jewlery since i've met Dean. Needless to say he was in his element! I was in the midst of having another 'moment' as we call them and but Dean took charge and the flowers were absolutly perfect. He knew my favorite flowers and with the flower shops help Jackson's caskate peice was a perfect blend of the two!

Chelles